


It Ain't Wrong Loving You

by natgayvanlis



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Attempt at Humor, F/F, Fluff, Smutt, and a single parent, carmilla is a mom, ew hollence, there's elsie and carmilla too
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-26
Updated: 2017-11-11
Packaged: 2018-11-19 07:20:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11308488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/natgayvanlis/pseuds/natgayvanlis
Summary: At the age of 25, Carmilla Karnstein was having the perfect life she ever imagined to have. She’s happily married to her university girlfriend, Ell and they now have a son named Wyatt. Carmilla is working as a paralegal, while Ell is managing her father’s business.Everything came tumbling down when she loses her wife Ell to her battle against cancer.Now, at the age of 32, Carmilla decides to move hers and Wyatt’s life to Toronto to try and start new.Base on the 1993 movie, Sleepless in Seattle but I'll be adding some tidbits that are not from the movie.





	1. Recollection

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, yes, I'm back with a new fanfic.

The cool breeze and the warm light coming from the sun entered the bedroom window and embraces the sleeping form in the bed. Birds were lightly chirping at the nearby trees. The alarm clock starts to blare indicating it’s already 7:30 in the morning. Time to get up, she knows that’s what her mind and body wants her to do, so as if on autopilot she finally forced herself to stand up.

When she had finished taking a quick shower, she walked towards the next bedroom.

“Wyatt” She starts with a soft knock and when she still couldn’t hear a reply she the open the door very slowly and walks towards her son’s bed. “Wyatt, wake up you’re gonna be late for school.” She tries again, this time with a little shaking on his shoulder until he finally stirs to wake up.

“Morning, mom” He mumbles as he starts to seat up.

“Morning, Little Man.” She greets back her son as she ruffles his hair.

“Mom! I told you not to call me that.” Wyatt complains at his mom’s affection.

“But you’re still my little man, you’re only 6.” She said turning around to give her son a piggyback ride.

“Now, you go take a shower, remember to keep the door open while I make you breakfast.”

“Yes mom, are you going to make me some waffles?” His blue eyes were sparkling and of course Carmilla couldn’t say no to that.

\--

Ever since Ell died, a year ago, this has been their routine. It was as if someone had programmed the way they should live their life. The first few months were the hardest. Carmilla barely spoke to anyone. She even became irresponsible in taking care of her own son, it was until he got involved in a little accident in his day care, when Carmilla decides to take care of him again. So a year after Ell’s death, when Carmilla can no longer take the memories of Ell she then decide that they would move to Toronto to start a new life. 

At Toronto, she was somehow forced to work at her sister Mattie at their law firm there, which she was hesitant at first, but since their moving was a little unplanned, Mattie then decides to offer her a job and a place for them to stay in with the excuse of she couldn’t bare to see her and her nephew struggling to live in a different place. Having no choice, Carmilla accepts the offer, especially now that Wyatt has started with his school again.

She still misses Ell a lot and it’s still visible to anyone who knows her, even to her co workers. Especially Kirsch, who had tried to set her up here and there but nothing works out.

Carmilla ends up either not showing up or gives an excuse of leaving early because of her son. And honestly, even at a very young age, Wyatt could see the sadness his mom carries.

“You ready to leave, little man” Carmilla asks.

“Yes mom.” Wyatt answers after he put his back pack on. His hands gripping firmly onto his mother's hand.

Once out of their little apartment, Wyatt ran over to their car which he does all the time no matter how much Carmilla would tell him not to.

The drive from their apartment going to Wyatt’s school takes about 30 minutes and from his school, Carmilla needs to drive for 10 more minutes. Good thing, there’s a school nearby Mattie’s law firm so it would be easier for her to go to Wyatt if he ever needs anything.

After dropping him off to his school, Carmilla drove to Karnstein and Belmonde Law Offices. The name of the company is from her dad’s and Mattie’s dad’s last name.

It had always been a joke between the sisters that their Maman have managed to name this business entity after their fathers even though, Lilita had said many times before that she hated them.

“What are these?” Carmilla asks as she entered her office cubicle that is full of flowers.

“Flowers.” Sarah Jane retorted. 

“I could see that. I just meant why do I have these on my table? Carmilla said, looking at the flowers as if they were a bomb that would be exploding any time soon.

As Carmilla tried to look for a card, she heard the approaching click clack of Mattie’s footstep.

“Kitty, dear. Good morning.” She greets.

“Morning” Carmilla mumbles without even taking a glimpse to her sister.

“I have sent you these flowers as a little welcome to your new office.”

“Mattie, I have been working with you for almost 3 months now.” Carmilla says with a little roll of her eyes.

“I know, but I had been busy traveling lately and realized I haven’t officially welcomed you here.”

“Okay…”

Mattie noticed that Carmilla is somehow trying to work on her brains to know why she did this, so she decides to speak again.

“Actually..”

“Mattie, if this is going to be one of those lectures you tell me every now and then about me getting a therapist my answer would still be a no.”

“But you really need to get some help.”

“Oh, Mattie I’m sure you are aware of that as I am. I mean look.” Carmilla then moves to open her desk drawer, pulling out a blue box. “See these are all business cards of different shrinks around here, that almost every employee here had given me which is pretty awkward though. So if I am interested, I would’ve gone without even being told.” She says as she tries her best to stay calm and not to sound so annoyed.

“There’s nothing wrong about it, we all grieve and I know how much it breaks you when Elizabeth had died, but it breaks me too to see you this broken and unhappy. May be you can try it sometime. If not for you but at least for Wyatt, anyway I gotta go back to my office now. Later, sis.”

The day at the office went by quickly. It wasn’t anything eventful. By four in the afternoon, Carmilla left the office and went to pick up Wyatt.

\--

“Hey, little man.” Carmilla says as she crouched down to prepare herself for a hug from her supersonic son.

“It was fun mom. Look I got two stars!” He proudly held up his hands to show them to his mother.

“Wow! Good boy! Looks like someone is getting a popcorn treat tonight” She said as she started to stand.

“Yes!” He said as he fist pumped in the air. When Carmilla finally stood, it was only then she notice a little girl standing behind her son, and Wyatt must’ve noticed that his mom was staring at her.

“Mom, I almost forgot. This is my girlfriend, Jessica.” Wyatt introduces her to his mom who in returned just blinked about what her son had just revealed to her. But before Carmilla could say anything else a teenage boy approached Jessica and told her that their dad is already there to pick them up.

When Carmilla and Wyatt left the school, the two went to get some groceries at the nearest grocery store.

“Hop on, little man” Carmilla says as she carries Wyatt to let him ride the grocery cart.”

“Thanks, mom.”

“So, Jessica huh?”

“Mhmn” Wyatt replies as he plays with Carmilla’s phone.

“And she’s your girlfriend?” Carmilla is still obviously shocked about this news, though of course she knows it’s nothing serious yet she just wasn’t ready to deal with it. At least not this early. Her son is only seven!

“Yeah.” Wyatt replied. “She is my classmate and we seat together at lunch.” He said adoringly.

They were on their way to the cashier when Carmilla sees a blonde girl who was talking animatedly to a giant red head.

What had surprised Carmilla is that when they had locked eyes for a few seconds it felt like her heart had stopped beating and her world stopped spinning in a good way.

She even gave Carmilla a bright smile from across the aisle. The staring contest had come to an end when the giant red head called for the tiny girl’s attention and for whatever reason it was, Carmilla automatically decides not to like the red head as if there would even be a chance for them to meet up again.

At home, Carmilla have prepared them a spaghetti bolognese for dinner. 

“Mom, you said I was going to get a popcorn tonight?” Wyatt complains as he stood beside his mom as she pours the spaghetti to a serving plate.

“Yes, you will. But for now, you gotta eat some dinner.”

“Can we skip spaghetti and go to popcorn right away?”

“No you can’t.”

 

Just when Wyatt was about to complain again, their doorbell rings. He was about to run towards the door when Carmilla stopped him. “What did I tell you about opening the door?”

“Sorry, mom.” It had been Carmilla’s rule that Wyatt isn’t allowed to open the door because they wouldn’t know who they would be opening it for.

When Carmilla had opened the door it reveals her twin brother, William.

“William, what are you doing here?”

“Nice to see you too, Kitty.” He greets as he walked past Carmilla to enter the apartment.

“Uncle Will!” Wyatt runs towards his favorite uncle.

“What’s up, man?” He asks as he carries him.

“Mom, wouldn’t let me skip dinner before I can have the popcorn.” He replied.

Carmilla gave William a warning look before he could say anything to his nephew.

“Sorry kid, we gotta listen to your mom. You and I both know she is the boss in this house.”

“Okay..”

“Maybe we can play xbox before I go home, if your mom agrees?” Will said, changing the subject.

“Fine. But only for an hour, it’s still school day.” Carmilla said as they all settled on the dining table.

Once Will left, Carmilla had settled to her bed to get ready for sleep but what surprises her is that the last thing that is running in her mind is the smile of the blonde girl from the grocery earlier. She couldn’t help but smile as she remembers how pretty she is, and for the first time in forever even though there may not be a reason for them to see each other again, Carmilla had felt hope. So maybe things might have change.

But for now, she wishes for a good night sleep.


	2. Considerations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla have some life decisions to make.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello, i'm sorry it took me forever to update this as depression is keeping me from doing so, anyway here's a not too long and not too short update. enjoy!

Laura wakes up with a sudden jolt after she heard insistent knocks on her door. When she finally adjusted herself into being awake, she finally have realized that she’s still at work and the one who woke her up is their company janitor.

“Hey Ed.” she greets.

Old Ed have always been a witness to those employees who stays up late at the office on some assignment they are working on but fails as they fall asleep in the process and Laura isn’t an exception from being woken up by the old man.

“You fell asleep here- again” he says as he walks towards where Laura’s trash bin sat.

“What time is it?” Laura asks.

“It’s almost midnight. I suggest that if you plan on going home, you leave now before the rain gets even heavier.” Ed said.

“Okay.” Laura said as she simultaneously start packing up her things. “Thanks, Ed.”

\--

During dinners, Carmila noticed that Wyatt was always listening to a certain radio program and tonight was no exception to that and as a mom, she knows it was her duty to interrogate her son. Wyatt must’ve notice it that he decides to bring it up to his mom.

“Mom” he starts after he drinks his milk.

“Yes sweetie?”

“You probably have notice that I kept listening to that radio show right?”

Carmilla eyes him suspiciously but nods for him to continue.

“Well.” He answers as he turns his body towards his mom “I’ve been thinking, of letting you share your story over the phone. About losing mom, and about how you and I cope with her cancer and death.”

To say that Carmilla is surprised with Wyatt had just told her is underrated. “Baby, sharing my story on the radio is something we shouldn't be doing. We are living in a quiet and peaceful life.”

“I understand that mom, but I notice that most of those callers gets help and advice from the listeners so I don't think it would hurt if we try. I just wanted to see you happy again, mom, and I’m sorry for planning out something for you.” 

Carmilla took a deep breath after she heard what her son said. She never wanted to make him upset and she immediately felt guilty with how she acted towards her son. “Let mom think about it?” She offers after a few seconds of silence.

“Thank you mom.” Wyatt then stood up to give his mom a hug.

The mother and son duo went on with their dinner, exchanging stories of how their day went by.

Once Carmilla had finished clearing up the dishes, she went up to help Wyatt with his homework. After that, she then tucked Wyatt to bed.

\--

As Laura was parking her car, she notice that there were already Christmas lights blooming on the front yard, so this meant only one thing- Danny’s back from her business trip.

So when Laura entered their apartment she immediately look forward to Danny.

“Danny? Babe. I’m home.” She calls out while she was removing her coat.  
“Hey, you’re home.”

“Shouldn't I be the one telling you that? What time did you arrived?” Laura asked her girlfriend before giving her a quick peck on the lips.

“I wanted to surprise you, so I came home early. And when I got here, I notice those fairy lights scattered on the dining table, and figured you wanted to have it decorated when you get home.” Danny explained.

“Yeah, you’re right but I always end up getting home late.”

“Figures. That’s why I have decided on doing it for you.” Danny said. “Anyway, I was thinking of taking you out for dinner but I guess you’re too tired for that. So maybe we’ll just call for pizza or chinese?” 

“Hmm chinese sounds good. Thanks, babe.” Laura said before she enters their room to change into something more comfortable.

While Laura was changing, Danny took this chance to make a call at the nearest Chinese restaurant and ordered their usual set of orders.

A couple of minutes later, Laura went back down to the living room area, where Danny was still making the orders.

When Danny finally managed to hang up the phone, she turns her attention to her girlfriend who was trying so hard not to yawn.

“Tired?” She asks Laura as she gave her soft back rubs.

“Yes. A little” Laura answered, and finally giving in to yawns.

“Want to take a nap while we wait for the food?” Danny offered.

To be entirely honest, this is what Laura wanted to do but then, she wouldn't want to sleep if this could be a quick chance of catching up with her girlfriend. It’s not that they don’t have other time to talk, it just so happens that Laura finds it more intimate to catch up with Danny tonight cause stories are still fresh.

Danny must have notice Laura's hesitation so she speaks up. “Laura, babe. It’s okay for me if you take a nap, the food won't be here in at least half an hour so you'll have enough time to have a nap.”

After about 40 minutes, their food had finally arrived and once Danny had prepared everything in their dining table, she went over to the couch where Laura was sleeping. However, when she got near Laura, she hesitated waking her up as she was sleeping peacefully, but Danny knows that even though Laura is so tired from work she’s also hungry and needs to have a proper dinner. So with hesitance, she still woke her girlfriend.

When Laura finally wake, the two finally indulged with their chinese food. Once they had finished eating, Danny offered clearing up the take away basket to let Laura take a shower before going to bed.

Having Danny in Laura’s life is something she considers as a wonderful gift.

\--

Carmilla was folding up their clothes when she had noticed that something had changed with her son’s mood. He no longer listen to the radio show he always listens to, and Carmilla have felt nothing but guilt when she declined her son’s request. She was considering doing the phone call but still worries of having her life story be talked about by everyone. 

She thinks that maybe she’s just overreacting or just protecting herself too much for not agreeing with her son’s requesting. Carmilla had to wrack her brain as to convince herself in doing the phone call. It’s just a silly radio talk show after all.

Perhaps, maybe talking to Mattie about this would help ease her worries.

So when Wyatt was finally sleeping she decides to call her sister, Mattie.

“Hey, Carmilla” Mattie greets after answering the call on the third ring.

“Hi, Mattie. How are you?” 

“Whoa, sis. What has gotten you into this kind of vibe? You know we never talked this formal.’ Mattie teased. Carmilla chuckled at this. Mattie was right, they were never formal to each other so she continues.

“Well your nephew is into something and when I told him that it is something I’m sure to do, his mood changed and it upsets me.”

“What does the little monster wants?” 

“There is this certain radio show that he listens to at night. The show is about love advices, where callers shares their stories and listeners snoop around their private lives and Wyatt wants me to call and share my story about Ell’s death.”

“And you are calling me because..?” 

Before Carmilla answered, she took a deep breath and released it afterwards; “I don’t know, Mattie but I was thinking of doing what my son wanted. But I’m also just too worried that my-our life would be like exposed to hundreds of people out there.” She explains to her sister.

“Do you want to hear my advice?” Mattie asked.

Carmilla answered softly.

“I’ve to be honest with you. I don’t see anything wrong about trying out what Wyatt wanted you to do. There’s nothing wrong about sharing your story and I know it isn't the same as how shared some bits of your life to your former therapist but there isn't something wrong about sharing it to hundreds of people. Darling, these are just some random people who doesn't and would probably not know you in person-”

“So you’re saying I give it a shot?” Carmilla asked her sister.

“Yes. I totally don't see anything wrong about it and you yourself already said that those people who shares their story gets to be inspiration to others- so I guess it’s just right to have your own story be an inspiration to the listeners.”

After Carmilla’s debate and conversation with Mattie, she went to take a shower to get herself a little relaxed before finally heading to bed.

The next day, Carmilla woke up to tiny footsteps approaching her bedroom. 

“Mom?” Wyatt asked. “Are you awake?” 

“Yes baby. Come over here” Carmilla calls him over.

When he approached the bed, he fidgets before climbing the bed and lying next to his mom.

“What’s wrong little man?” Concern was totally laced on Carmilla’s voice.

“I dreamt about Mommy.” He says a little confused.

“Do you remember what the dream was all about? She asks.

“A little? All I could remember is that she showed up at school while I was on the swing and she smiled and told me that I should help you be happy.” Wyatt explained.

“Aww baby, but you are making me happy.” Carmilla says as she snuggles closer to her son.

“I know mom. But I don't think it’s already enough, maybe you need someone to take care of you other than me.” 

“Wow, you’re such a grown up little man.” She teases her son.

“I’m serious mom!” He said. “Maybe consider dating again?”

“You’re okay with that?” 

“I know it kinda feels like replacing mommy but it could be a way for you to have move and be happy and I know that, it’s what mommy would want.” Wyatt explained.

“How do you feel if we start with that radio show you always listen to?” Carmilla offers.

“I think that would be great mom. Thank you!”

\--  
Carmilla weird spent the weekend thinking about what to say on that silly radio show that she even wrote a script about it, but really who could blame her she just wanted to filter song things about her life story and she decides that if she ever meets the right person to share with her life, then that would be the time she would reveal her entire story.

As she thinks of getting to meet someone who she could share her life with, it was so odd that the blonde girl with the jolly red giant at the grocery pops in her head and she feels like that that woman would make a difference to her life and to Wyatt's but she knows that it is just some odd, weird, and crazy wishful thinking. 

So maybe, she should really start dating to avoid these kinds of wishful thinking but maybe some day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i made few changes on chapter one such as changing the chapter title from highs and lows to recollection and changing carmilla's and wyatt's age. other than that every thing stay's the same. 
> 
> this is un beta but hopefully the upcoming chapters will be. 
> 
> ps lemme know your thoughts?

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts?


End file.
